The Bible doesn’t tell us to like everyone, but we are commanded to love everyone. Here are just a few of the scriptures that make it clear:
1 John 4:21: And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.
1 John 4:8: Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
Luke 6:32 & 35 Jesus said: Love your enemies. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.
Leviticus 19:18: Love your neighbor as yourself.
In fact, Jesus said there are two great and primary commandments (Matthew 22:37-40) and simply put, they are: Love God and love people. In fact, Jesus said all the commandments hang on these two; they are foundational to our faith. Easy to say, right? Love God, love people—but when you run into unlikable people, you feel like you've hit the spiritual brick wall. Since we cannot like them, we usually conclude we cannot love them either. Isn’t it true that we just naturally think you have to like someone before you can love them? Like is the first step, the beginning of love. So how can you love someone you don't like?
Part of the problem is that love has different definitions, and we sometimes get them confused. In the Bible we find three types of love in the original language. The first is Philo, which is the love we have toward friends, family, and others in our lives. Philo love is what Paul describes in Romans 12:10: Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.
Then there is Eros love, which is a more physical form of love. It’s the kind of love shared between a husband and wife, hopefully accompanied by Philo love as well.
Then there is Agape love, which is the unconditional love God has for you and me. Nothing you do can change how God loves you. Ephesians 2:4-5 describe this Agape love:
But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.
This is love which loves because its own inherent nature is to love. That's why the Bible says, God is love (1 John 4:8). Love is his nature.
The kind of love we need to love people we don't like is agape love. Now, agape love is not necessarily a feeling. We can love with agape love whether the feelings are present or absent, whether they are good or bad, whether this love is reciprocated or not. It is not based on feelings.
Agape love is an action. That’s how it's always described in Scripture. The Bible tells us we know God loves us because he sent his Son into the world to redeem us. We know Jesus loves us because he gave his life for us. The Bible says, Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends (John 15:13). And Jesus said that we know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands (1 Johnn 2:3).
God's kind of love is an action, not a feeling. Now, that really is good news, because it means we can love people toward whom we do not necessarily have good feelings. You can love people toward whom you have no feelings at all. Since love is an action, you can obey God's command to love everyone.
First Corinthians 13 is a good place to look for a practical description of love. A few of these are:
Patience: When you act with patience toward someone, you are loving them. Keep in mind that love is not a feeling, so we don't have to feel patient. Can you remember acting with patience even when you did not feel patient? That is agape love.
Kindness: When you feel like saying something sarcastic or cutting or angry, but instead you say something kind, that is a love action.
Not Jealous: When you refuse to behave jealously or possessively,
1 John 4:21: And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.
1 John 4:8: Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
Luke 6:32 & 35 Jesus said: Love your enemies. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.
Leviticus 19:18: Love your neighbor as yourself.
In fact, Jesus said there are two great and primary commandments (Matthew 22:37-40) and simply put, they are: Love God and love people. In fact, Jesus said all the commandments hang on these two; they are foundational to our faith. Easy to say, right? Love God, love people—but when you run into unlikable people, you feel like you've hit the spiritual brick wall. Since we cannot like them, we usually conclude we cannot love them either. Isn’t it true that we just naturally think you have to like someone before you can love them? Like is the first step, the beginning of love. So how can you love someone you don't like?
Part of the problem is that love has different definitions, and we sometimes get them confused. In the Bible we find three types of love in the original language. The first is Philo, which is the love we have toward friends, family, and others in our lives. Philo love is what Paul describes in Romans 12:10: Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.
Then there is Eros love, which is a more physical form of love. It’s the kind of love shared between a husband and wife, hopefully accompanied by Philo love as well.
Then there is Agape love, which is the unconditional love God has for you and me. Nothing you do can change how God loves you. Ephesians 2:4-5 describe this Agape love:
But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.
This is love which loves because its own inherent nature is to love. That's why the Bible says, God is love (1 John 4:8). Love is his nature.
The kind of love we need to love people we don't like is agape love. Now, agape love is not necessarily a feeling. We can love with agape love whether the feelings are present or absent, whether they are good or bad, whether this love is reciprocated or not. It is not based on feelings.
Agape love is an action. That’s how it's always described in Scripture. The Bible tells us we know God loves us because he sent his Son into the world to redeem us. We know Jesus loves us because he gave his life for us. The Bible says, Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends (John 15:13). And Jesus said that we know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands (1 Johnn 2:3).
God's kind of love is an action, not a feeling. Now, that really is good news, because it means we can love people toward whom we do not necessarily have good feelings. You can love people toward whom you have no feelings at all. Since love is an action, you can obey God's command to love everyone.
First Corinthians 13 is a good place to look for a practical description of love. A few of these are:
Patience: When you act with patience toward someone, you are loving them. Keep in mind that love is not a feeling, so we don't have to feel patient. Can you remember acting with patience even when you did not feel patient? That is agape love.
Kindness: When you feel like saying something sarcastic or cutting or angry, but instead you say something kind, that is a love action.
Not Jealous: When you refuse to behave jealously or possessively,